While many of us ladies subtly appreciate a certain boy-ish charm, at the end of the day, we all want to date a man. Once you’re out of your teens and early 20s, there’s nothing attractive about a guy who’s immature and lacks direction. Instead, we set our sights on the ones who’ve got their head screwed on straight and are ready to have an adult relationship. We’ve already covered the 9 signs a man is dating a real woman but ladies, if your boyfriend meets any of the following criteria, chances are you’ve landed a real man.

1. He’s committed to a healthy lifestyle.

Boys aren’t quite done fucking around yet, but men are. Men are committed to things like their health, the cleanliness of their apartment, and their hobbies. They’re committed to paying their bills on time, ramping up their side business, and working on their fitness. A real man has roots.

2. He makes dinner reservations.

Your boy might casually suggest drinks sometime soon, but your man will tell you that he’s made reservations for 7:00 tomorrow evening at that new Italian spot that got rave reviews. There’s a huge difference between the plans men make with women, versus the non-plans boys haphazardly attempt to make with women.

3. He doesn’t waste anyone’s time.

A man will be straightforward instead of beating around the bush. If he doesn’t think something is a good idea, he’ll say it. He doesn’t believe in wasting anyone’s time or giving people false hope. He may not always tell you exactly what you want to hear, but at least he’s honest and doesn’t avoid unpleasant conversations.

4. He doesn’t live life lying down.

You won’t have to worry about a man doing anything the lazy way. One of the reasons women go on less dates than they could is because the men they might be interested in are too passive to make a real effort in pursuing them. Boys are lazy and tend to put minimal effort into their pursuit of women. Men will knock your damn door down to get to you if they want you.

5. His words match up with his actions.

Real men don’t give the women they’re dating mixed signals. If he says he’ll be somewhere, he really will be there. If he says he wants to see you, he always follows up with a plan. Boys can be flaky, but men are reliable.

6. He’s got plans for his future.

A real man knows the importance of planning for his future. He not only knows what he wants to achieve, but he also has plans on how to achieve those things. A real man always wants more for himself, and will put in the work and focus required to get there.

7. He’s picky.

He’s picky because he can be. He’s a good catch worthy of dating a good woman – and he’s looking for a woman, not a girl. On your first date, rather than thinking about whether or not he’d like to take you back to his place, he was instead legitimately deciding if you were even worthy of a second date. He knows what he’s looking for, and he’s sizing you up to see if you possess those qualities he desires. If you’re not mature enough for him or you play games, he’ll move on.

8. He won’t build you up just to break you down.

Real men don’t butter women up only to demonstrate a lack of sincerity by showing their true colors later on. A man won’t suddenly switch from gentleman to asshole two weeks down the road.

9. His gentlemanly traits come effortlessly.

He doesn’t think twice about whether or not he’s going to pick you up – of course he would do that for you. If he’s able to get out of work to be your date for an important event, he’ll naturally make that effort. He’s got your back. His gentlemanly traits come second-nature.

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